My Life Since Grad School

OK, this is such a bullshit non-post. But recently, a flurry of emails were exchanged among people with whom I attended Columbia J-School in '96. Someone posed the question: What has everyone been doing since graduation? My entry was as follows. Enjoy:
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OK, I'll bite, given that I probably have the strangest (and perhaps saddest) career trajectory:

After Columbia graduation, I was one of the first production assistants hired at the brand new Fox News Channel. At the time, I thought, "Hey, it's Fox! 'Married With Children!' 'Melrose Place!' 'The Simpsons!' This will be fun!"

Yeah, not so much.

For reasons that continue to baffle to this day, I remained at FNC for more than five years, eventually becoming a senior producer. One day, after telling the executive producer of Daytime to go f-ck himself (and after finally coming to the realization that I was literally and figuratively a Jew working for the Nazis), I decided I badly needed a change of scene. So I moved to WABC as line producer of the nightly 11 o'clock newscast.

That lasted six months. It became painfully clear to me almost immediately that I just didn't want to produce news anymore -- not at FNC, not at WABC, not anywhere. What I really wanted was to be a stand-up comic.

(Cue the crickets.)

So I quit WABC, took the summer off, wrote a bunch of jokes and began cocktail-waiting at a gay bar. And on Sept. 5, 2003, I made my comedy debut at a new talent night at Gotham Comedy Club. It went surprisingly well, and I kept doing it, eventually getting to host and produce my own shows at Carolines, Comix, and and Midtown's Therapy lounge. (Always a producer, never a bride.) I made brief appearances on Vh-1's "Best Week Ever," tru-TV's "Smoking Gun Presents: World's Dumbest Criminals" and NBC's "Last Comic Standing," on which I made the Season Six NYC finals.

Around the time I had begun doing stand-up, a friend of mine working in IT at The New York Times said he could probably get me a freelance gig as a clerk for the paper. It was exactly what I wanted: A ridiculously easy day job I could do four or five days a week while I pursued comedy at night. I ended up staying at The Times for six years, ultimately rising (?) to the position of administrative manager of the Culture desk. Truly the world's greatest day job -- or at least it was before the newspaper began to crumble.

Then, on New Year's Eve, at the dawn of 2008, the unexpected happened: I fell in love. With a sailor. Who was just about to be stationed in San Diego for two and half years.

I leapt.

Goodbye, Times; Goodbye, New York comedy scene; Hello, San Diego and unemployment.

So here I am nearly two years later, still in San Diego, still with my sailor (he's a keeper), trying to keep my feet in comedy in this culturally retarded city and working at what may be the worst day job I've ever had: [THIS PART REDACTED.] Still, it's work, and health benefits, too. In California these days, that's what passes for a glamour position.

All of which is to say, if any of you has a lead on a job -- ANY JOB -- in the San Diego area for which I might be qualified, speak up.

And if you'd like to see what my comedy is like (NSFW unless you work for a gay porn distributor), click here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f8obPLSgiwY

And here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQCHQZ3_p0E

Love and good wishes to you all,
Adam
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Homo faked posted. ♥