Catching Up

OK, I'm back. And I apologize -- not just to you, my readers, but to myself. To go this long without posting a blog is a form of self-abuse because all my creative muscles atrophy, and I become a zombie, capable only of eating, sleeping, going to the gym and watching countless hours of reality TV.

There is no real excuse for my absence except that I've been working at a new full-time job for the past month. It's non-comedy related -- non-creative in any way, actually. In fact it's pretty mind-numbing altogether, and it occupies nearly all my waking hours. But I am grateful to have found ANY job given the current economy, especially here in California. Truly, utterly grateful. Also on the plus side, my job requires that I occasionally drive a golf cart. And so there are times when I'll be doing so and I think to myself, "I can't believe I'm driving a golf cart through the streets of suburban San Diego. How did this become my life?"

As for the comedy... it's more or less over for now. And I emphasize for now because I believe I'll go back to it if and when time and opportunity allow. But my priorities have shifted. I am building a life with a wonderful man and doing what I must to stay afloat economically, just as the rest of America is.

That said, if anyone out there wants to offer me my own TV show, I still wouldn't say "No."

It's funny: Now that it's been weeks since I performed or blogged, I catch myself writing material in my head without even trying. (This is what used to happen in the years before I ever tried stand-up.) I don't know if it's necessarily GOOD material, but it's material. Like I was watching "Liza With a Z" (which is both awesome and incredibly disturbing) on one of the movie channels the other day, and I thought:

"You know, lesbians must love Liza Minnelli. Otherwise, why would they all have her haircut?"

Seriously: That's some pretty dykey hair.

As I write this, I am at work and being interrupted every 30 seconds (this is not the kind of job with a lot of down time), so I'm not sure how long this post is going to be. Nevertheless, moving on...

I do feel particularly blessed to be living where I am right now. The erstwhile iPod thief notwithstanding, it's a truly lovely home in a truly lovely city. I took some photos:

The view from our balcony. Everyone says it looks like "Melrose Place."

On the way back from the pool. Stupidly, I forgot to take a picture of the pool.

The yellow rosebush I planted on the balcony. I have officially become an old queen.

Our living room, as decorated by Catwoman. (Speaking of old queens.)

My favorite part of the kitchen.

Even Carmen has her own underground parking spot!

Pretty sweet, right? And the irony is, people in San Diego love to bitch about how expensive it is to live here. My living expenses are a fourth of what they are in New York, and I'm living in a friggin' palace, comparatively. (Did I mention the hot tub?)

A question for any of you cyber-geeks reading this: How can I move photos around this page without fucking up all my spacing? I use a PC, and every time I upload a photo to the blog post, it appears at the top of the page, and then I have to drag it to where I want it. Doing so messes up all the text -- creating extra lines of space. Then, when I backspace to close all the gaps, I somehow permanently delete all the hard returns and can't get them back. The result is that my blog often appears as a giant run-on sentence. This is a MAJOR pain in the ass for me. And the few times I've used BW's Apple, it doesn't happen, because on the Apple version one can cut and paste the photo rather than dragging it. Is the Blogger program simply incompatible with PCs? Help me, Obie Wan!

Some quick takes on what's on TV these days:

Favorite new show: "Kings" on NBC. Love it. Love everything about it. Have no idea what's going on half the time and don't care. It's sexy and weird and totally intriguing, and there's a hot, closeted gay prince on it. Plus, it's the only show BW and I both enjoy and is thus very important to the continued success of our relationship. Therefore, please tune in.

Homoerotica? You're soaking in it.

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Still lovin' more than life: "Friday Night Lights." I can't fathom how this show remains on the air when there are exactly three people in the world who watch it: Myself and my dear friends Amy and Seth. But regardless, this season is the best one yet. After Coach and Tami discover Julie's been having sex with Saracen and then Tami has her mother-daughter talk with Julie and starts crying and Julie says, "Why are you crying?," and Tami says, "Because I wanted you to WAIT!"... well, I don't mind telling you all that I started bawling like the little girl that I am. Try watching it and then tell me you don't do the same.

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Sort of over it: "American Idol." Yes, I'll continue watching it til the bitter end, but it just feels tired. How many times can we hear the judges talk about song choice before it becomes white noise? And I never thought anyone could make Paula more likable, but Cara DiaWhatsHerFace is somehow accomplishing it. It's obvious that gay chorus boy Adam Lambert will be crowned this year's idol, and yes, he deserves it, but... I don't know, I'm just over it.

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Still, "Idol" is not nearly as tiresome as "Hell's Kitchen." Every single episode goes the same way: The chefs totally fuck up dinner service (making the same dishes -- risotto, beef wellington, and something called John Dory), and then Chef Ramsey loses his shit. Honestly, there is no variation to this pattern, and I for one am sick of it. (I do like it when he calls the women "stupid cows," though, just because no American would ever dare.)

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That's all folks. I could go on -- it feels good to write again. But I can't deal with the constant work interruptions anymore. Love and good wishes to all, and I'll be back again as soon as I'm able.

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Homo employed. ♥