McCain: Weirdly subdued -- looked as uncomfortable shilling for Bush as you know he is. Classily avoided criticizing fellow Vietnam vet Kerry, but lost credibility with his over-the-top defense of the senseless war in Iraq. Michael Moore line was great political theater.
(By the way: Michael Moore is my hero. But seriously, Michael, it's time to lose the "I'm a big fat smelly slob" look. At the very least, shave. You know you're in enemy territory. You don't have to provide ammunition by looking like the creepy middle-aged guy who hangs around the playground after school.)
Giuliani: Brilliant. Perfect. Aside from Bill Clinton, the greatest living politician. Attacked Kerry without seeming mean-spirited. Conjured up the tragedy of 911 without exploiting it. Would be president some day if the Republican party were not dominated by deranged extremists.
Nice party platform, by the way. I'm surprised they left out their support for a pro-cross burning amendment. Does this stuff really represent the agenda of half the people in America?
OK, enough of my soapbox. Now to the important stuff -- the contents of the 2004 Welcoming Committee gift bag:
2-oz bag of Dunkin Donuts "100% Arabica Coffee," obviously a bone tossed to Al-Jazeera.
Disposable 35-mm camera, courtesy of B & H -- the photo store, not the bagel shop.
Children's book entitled, "Miffy Loves New York City," brought to you by Michelin, to be wrapped and given to my nephew Xander for Chanukkah.
Tiny AstraZeneca runner's pedometer, to be wrapped and given to my sister, Anna, for same.
Kraft Macaroni & Cheese "Republicans in 2004" edition dinner, complete with pasta bites that are supposed to resemble elephants but actually look like turtles.
Black pleather spiral notebook with "2004 Republican National Convention" on the front, presented by some mysterious entity known as MeadWestvaco.
"Guide to New York City Landmarks," third edition; possible Chanukkah gift for parents or Granny.
60-Minute Verizon prepaid phone card, useless for me as I no longer have a land line. Who wants it?
"Ellis Island: The DVD," brought to you by the History Channel. I'm actually sort of interested in watching this, and then giving it to Uncle Michael for Chanukkah.
Free 1-week membership to New York Sports Club. Been there, done that.
Small bag of red, white and blue M & Ms, for candy dish in my apartment.
Hideous AT & T convention pin with movable Statue of Liberty. (Why does she move when the real one doesn't?)
Nifty, high-tech looking pen, courtesy of the USS Intrepid. Definite Chanukkah gift for nephew Tyler.
ConEdison key chain. (They really went all out, didn't they?)
8 Listerine PocketPaks.
And some tiny booklets and postcards too insubstantial to detail.
The bag itself is a complete and total piece of crap; a black, paper-thin vinyl messenger bag with a braided cotton strap that unravels when you look at it and velcro (!) attachments. Feh!
Finally (I know, Adam, wrap it up), here are the celebrities I've seen so far this week: Wolf Blitzer, Al Franken, Ted Koppel and Jim Angle; a shrimp, a blimp, a gimp and a pimp.